It was a warm day in July...the 23rd to be exact and I was still in a bit of pain. I woke up knowing what the day would bring and a part of me felt ready, but anxious. I had spent the night before preparing to be discharged from the hospital, after spending 10 days in Labor & Delivery. I would be going home to start my new normal. I was officially a "NICU Mom" to a micro preemie baby boy. Wow! While I looked forward to recovering from my c-section in the comfort of my own home, a part of me felt sad. I had to leave my new baby in the hospital, with people I didn't know but had to trust. It felt awkward and unsettling. How would I cope? How would I be able to relax? How would I be able to sleep at night being away from my first born who was fighting for his life? My husband and I were told we could call and come visit anytime we wanted. We also only lived about 12 minutes from the hospital which was very comforting. The first few days were a blur. I was numb and in auto pilot. I don't remember crying very much until day 9 when things took a turn with our son's health.
It's been said that all good things take time. So why do we as humans try to rush? Shouldn't we enjoy the season we are in without trying to rush to the next?
Recently someone commented on one of Jaxson's videos saying he was so smart. My immediate response was, "thank you!" I didn't stop to think about the things he hasn't yet accomplished, I simply was grateful for the compliment. The other night I was talking to my husband and I was semi complaining or expressing myself rather over the fact that Jaxson doesn't say a lot of words.